Lately, I have been struggling with spending time with the Lord. I feel extra guilty to admit that, but it’s true! I’ve been working a lot and I became a stage manager for a local play (I’ll let you guys know about our next show!).
I hope you’ll pray for me. I could really use it. June 16th was my ex’s birthday, and it took all my strength and every distraction to keep me from messaging him. I knew it wouldn’t be a good idea to open that door back up, but I was just really tempted.
Anyway, it’s been eight months since I broke up with my ex fiance’ and I am more confused than ever. I’ve been grappling about the reason for my existence. Why am I here?
There’s gotta be more to life than paying the bills. I’ve been looking for something. I have a God-sized hole in my heart and I constantly fill it up with doubts and questions.
Anyway, enough about me and my mess. I want to encourage you (as I encourage myself) to make a point to spend daily time with the Lord. It has become a twice a week thing for me lately, other than reading a verse here and there. I know that God doesn’t bless me based on the length of my Bible study time or prayers, but I desire to spend more time with him. I know that spending time with him is the only way to keep my head above water.
Typically when I spend time with God I play music. We all know how music can set a positive or negative mood. I play a song that encourages me to worship or pray, and just try to talk out my confusion or fears or thankfulness to God.
I rarely have enough time, but I try to make time to repent. Repentance isn’t just for when you accept Christ, it’s a discipline that all Christians should have. It’s a moment where you acknowledge your mistakes and ask God to forgive you for them. It’s also a great time to ask for His help to overcome them.
David gives us an example of repentance in Psalms 41:4
As for me, I said, “O Lord, be gracious to me;
Heal my soul, for I have sinned against You.
Christians make mistakes, but when we come to God truly repentant, He immediately forgives us. So much so, that He forgets what we’ve done. What a great gift!
Verses to Meditate on This Week
19Brethren, if anyone among you wanders from the truth, and someone turns him back, 20let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save a soul from death and cover a multitude of sins.
If you see a fellow Christian wandering from the truth! Help them out, pray for them, and seek to bring them back to the fold.
1Have mercy on me, O God,
because of your unfailing love.
Because of your great compassion,
blot out the stain of my sins.
2Wash me clean from my guilt.
Purify me from my sin.
3For I recognize my rebellion;
it haunts me day and night.
4Against you, and you alone, have I sinned;
I have done what is evil in your sight.
You will be proved right in what you say,
and your judgment against me is just.
5For I was born a sinner—
yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.
6But you desire honesty from the womb,
teaching me wisdom even there.
7Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8Oh, give me back my joy again;
you have broken me—
now let me rejoice.
9Don’t keep looking at my sins.
Remove the stain of my guilt.
10Create in me a clean heart, O God.
Renew a loyal spirit within me.
11Do not banish me from your presence,
and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.
12Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and make me willing to obey you.
I hope this helps! Peace, love, and blessings,
Btw, here’s a snap of me at my cubicle. lol